3 Wild and Crazy Girls Decide to Throw a Party....

When you live in the middle of nowhere, you have to make your own fun, and oh hell yes, we have made our own fun! I have never partied quite as much as when I lived in a certain desert park. We threw parties for EVERYTHING! Hey, my neighbor bought a coconut bra! Jimmy Buffet Party! or Hey, its Thursday and we have extra beer. Karaoke! but my personal favorite was Hey, I lost a bet and now have to throw a kick ass party as payback. Why not make it my 29th birthday party and the theme will be 1978?!

Yes, I had a 70s basement party, complete with Tab, PBR, Disco, (fake) illegal party favors, and Hunter S. Thompson. One thing I'll say about rangers... they know how to party.

So three wild and crazy girls set out to make this the best party of the season, or my payback on the bet wouldn't work. D, C and I each had a role to play. D was in charge of decorations and awards. You can't have a 70s party without a costume competition. She made Loser buttons for people who didn't dress up. These buttons were modeled after official campaign buttons by the politicians who lost the presidential races in the 70s. (Um, sorry to those politician guys but none of you looked familiar. Losers)

C and I were in charge of food, music and learning 70s dance routines. Basically, we watched that episode of That 70s show where they all dance at a disco, over and over again until we had it down!

As I Googled 70s party food, much to my delight I discovered that all the hors dourves that my mother and grandmother had been serving for years was 70s food! I knew exactly how to make this stuff.  Now if only the liquor procurement had gone as easily. Being as we lived in Utah, we would have to look far and wide for a liquor selection. Luckily one of our neighbors was heading to Colorado and after some sweet talking, he brought back the makings for White Russians. (I love them, they are 70s, and I'll probably never be able to drink them again. More on that later.)

Someone actually found Tab at a local store.... not that surprising in our neck of the woods. Some of the food on the grocery shelves was older than me!

Yeah, we were all stoked about the Tab. That stuff is horrible!

Now I must confess that the idea behind this party came a few months before when, at a thrift shop, C found an outfit that she couldn't pass up, but couldn't wear anywhere else.... I had a bridesmaid dress that would fit in and D decided she would come as Mrs. Robinson.

70s Bridesmaid, Mrs Robinson, and Disco Queen - the
masterminds behind the party

The entire park pitched in to help decorate. We had Christmas lights, a disco ball, extra basement furniture, lava lamp, even a mirror to keep in the bathroom for the powdered sugar lines... There was easy cheese, pigs-n-blankets, Tab, White Russians, and more.

Once the sun went down, the disco ball was lit up and as the music blared, the strangest costumes began walking into my house.

C's man showed up. Digging the chains and the shoes!

Smarmy Chuck brought Wonder Woman

Hunter S Thompson, Best Costume Award
He stayed in character all night, shouting at bats, staring into the
disco ball, spending way too much time with the lines in the bathroom....

The hippies did the Time Warp.

Disco Diva

We danced all night. The YMCA, the Hustle, and yes, C and I did our 70s Show routine. Awards were handed out for most authentic costume (Hunter ST), most original (Mrs. Robinson) and of course, the Loser buttons. Someone even got a Pet Rock for an award. C made me an awesome cake and there were birthday candles and singing. There was also lots of drinking. Everyone lives within walking distance so as long as people could walk up the stairs, they were free to go. For those of us living in my house, we drank a bit too much. I do remember perilously making my way up the stairs to mix 2 more jugs of White Russians... 1 for me, and 1 for C. I even found straws to make drinking from the jugs possible. This was NOT a good idea. This was the one and only time that I've ever blacked out from drinking. (It won't be happening again. A few days later, someone told me that I'd run out of cream so the 2nd jug was just milky vodka.... ew.)

While I was blacked out, and God-knows where, the party took a turn. Hunter S Thompson started playing Broomtar (broomstick as guitar) to Sister Christian with Disco Diva clawing at his feet. Smarmy Chuck might have snorted some powdered sugar in the bathroom. Eventually Wonder Woman apprehended Hunter ST for trying to kill too many imaginary bats. Smarmy Chuck lost his Jeri Curl wig, and his chest hair. Some time later, Hunter would be seen wearing the wig and giving his best come hither looks for the camera. Yes, my neighbors were cool enough to capture all of this on camera for me so I wouldn't miss a thing. I'm not posting those because I'm pretty sure everyone was pretty wasted.

In the morning, I awoke with a pretty bad hangover. Luckily, my friends had stayed after everyone else left and we danced (sweated) out most of our liquor. I made my way down the hall, I realized our house was now the scene of the Apocalypse. Blue sequins were everywhere, trash and cups littered the basement, dirty dishes were piled in the sink, and we still had a 12-pack of Tab to drink. But, I had paid back my lost wager, had a fantastic birthday party, and haven't drank a White Russian since!

YiiiiMCA!

PS.... I've moved 7 times since this party and I STILL find those damned turquoise sequins around my house. I lovingly refer to them as Corree-sequins.

The cheapest, and hardest, spa therapy I've ever had... or How I Shrunk My Leather Boots

Sometimes you wanna hike trails, with a map, trail guide, and difficulty ratings. Other times you just wanna start walking across untrodden soil, letting the landscape tell you its own story. This post is about something in between.... something the park service calls "routes". Those are my favorite.

A route is an unmaintained trail that enough people have walked and survived to pass on the information. I like these trails because I typically have it to myself, or may encounter a few people but they are cool hiker-types like myself.  :-)

One such hiking adventure started on a typical gorgeous morning living in the Waterpocket Fold. A friend, J, was visiting and we decided to hook up with another friend, R, for a day of route-hiking. We had a topo map (don't worry mom, I was well-prepared) and recommendations from friends on the particular route we'd be walking. This route was a canyon that parralleled the highway. Hard to get lost, by hard to get out of. We kinda of knew where to park, and we kinda knew where we'd come out of the canyon but the 7 miles in between, not so sure.

Me and J hiking through the Waterpocket Fold. See, no trail here.... this is a route.

The first half of our journey was great, gorgeous and fun. We were completely entrenched in a rock canyon, with no way out but to walk east. Every now and then we'd find a game trail along the side of a ravine. It got a little sketchy but R was great at keeping me calm. (I freak out easy if the ground I'm walking on isn't solid.) I guess I should mention that it was monsoon season so those 7 miles needed to be walked by noon. Catching yourself in a canyon during a rainstorm can be deadly and tourists die every year making this mistake. So yeah, I was a bit on edge.

Anyway.... we were seeing lots of birds, some deer, even scared some quail who couldn't fly and just kept running ahead of us for a mile! After a few hours, it began to sprinkle but nothing to worry about. Just enough to make us walk faster. I guess I was moving a bit too fast because as I was about to leap over a giant mud puddle, I slipped and fell in! The falling in mud part wasn't so bad, it was the getting stuck part that got me.  I had slipped into a puddle of wet betonite clay, the most slippery substance I've come across. My hiking boot and leg had been wedged down into the clay and I couldn't get out! J began to freak out a bit, yelling for R who was lagging behind. All I heard from her was "oh no! OH NO!" and then she asked if I was ok. I was, I just wasn't going anywhere. R came up behind me, grabbed the loops on my backpack and began tugging. With a great sucking sound, my leg and boot popped out. J, who had decided if I was laughing, life was ok, began taking photos... Here is my favorite...

This mud is spa-worthy. Afterwards, my leg was smooth and my pores never smaller!

and another....

and then this one...

I got chilly being stuck in a mud pit.... and it was raining...
hence the rain poncho. Go Aggies!

The rest of the trip, my leg mud dried as we walked through the most beautiful canyon I've ever seen. (yeah, even you, Grand Canyon!) The mud flaked off my leg and my boot, leaving both tighter and firmer.... some people pay lots of money for that treatment! At the very end of the trail, in order to get back to the highway, we had to wade through a pretty nasty, agriculture run-offy river and then bushwack our way through tamarask. After reaching the highway and realizing we had no idea where the car was, J and I took off east while R took off west with the keys. Glad he found the car first and came to pick us up. Another part of route hiking are the unforeseen adventures!

After I got home and showered, I cleaned my boots and wrapped them in newspaper to dry out. A few days later, they were clean and gorgeous, and 2 sizes smaller! So I gave them to a friend and bought some new ones. At least they could live to see another trail on another day.

All in all, a great day. What I remember most when I look back on that hike is this...

Take the trail less traveled and you shall be rewarded

Headlines From My Apartment

DUST STORM ROLLS THROUGH AS FLURRY OF CLEANING ACTIVITY INCREASES


A 13 BOOK PILE-UP OCCURRED LAST NIGHT ON COFFEE TABLE. NO KNOWN CAUSES


NEWLY ADOPTED CAT PLOTS TO TAKE OVER THE APARTMENT. DOG CANNOT BE REACHED FOR COMMENT


POLL: HOW MANY TIMES WILL THE COPS BE CALLED FOR NOISY NEIGHBORS THIS WEEKEND?


MAJORITY OF SEEDLINGS DIE DURING FREAK SPRING FROST


DOORBUSTER SALE ON USED KITTY LITTER. COME GET IT NOW WHILE IT'S FRESH!


KONY 2012: ARE WE SUPPOSED TO VOTE FOR HIM OR HUNT HIM DOWN?


33-YEAR OLD WOMAN STAGES SIT-IN ON COUCH IN RESPONSE TO "OUT OF THE WILD" DISCOVERY


OUTBREAK OF INFLUENZA! 100% OF OCCUPANTS INFECTED

Meet my alter ego... "Near Miss"

Have you ever had one of those days where you should probably have just stayed home? But you didn't and weird, possibly bad, things happened and now you have a kick-ass story and an even more kick-ass nickname? I have!

When you hike the Appalachian Trail along the east coast, or any long trail for that matter, you are given a trail name. You can make one up, or earn one by doing something (read: something really stupid). Or you can do what I did and give yourself one for doing something stupid. My trail name is Near Miss, for all those times I nearly missed dying while enjoying the great outdoors.

Maybe I gained the nickname after I accidently scared a bear that was sleeping up in a tall pine tree, causing it to come sliding down the tree, fireman-style, land a few feet from me and run off into the woods.

Scared a bear outta a tree!

Or was it from all those times where I was too busy sight-seeing while driving, only to have my best friend R calmly say "Um.... road?" as we were veering off towards a rock wall, or worse, NO WALL between us and the valley far far below.

Maybe it was the time the ginormous Yellowstone bison decided to bluff charge my tiny Honda Civic. The bison would have won, making my little zoom-zoom car its bitch in the process.

Wyoming-sized bison vs. college-sized car

Actually, the crowning Near Miss moment came on a day when my friend C and I went hiking. A day that we should have probably just stayed home, but then we wouldn't have this awesome story!...


It all began when C and I picked the 3rd highest peak in the park to hike that day. We'd found a nice 7-mile loop that would knock off another 4 miles of Appalachian Trail in my book. The day was sunny and clear, no rain predicted, and we were ready to hike!

The first 3 miles were great! Hiked through the woods, played in the river, then to some old cabins and hunting for berries. As we were hiking out of the valley, we noticed it was getting darker. Clouds were coming and it looked like rain. I'd hiked in the rain before and its not always a bad thing, in fact, it can be quite pleasant if you are prepared for it. We hiked a mile up out of the valley, discussing the weather and what we should do. By then, we had already made it to the Appalachian Trail, which would take us 3 miles back to the car. So this being the shortest route and still no rain, we continued on.

The 3 miles of AT that we were about to hike down were along the ridge of the 3rd highest peak in the park, surrounded by valleys on all sides. As we looked out the eastern edge towards Washington DC, we saw some storm clouds off in the distance. We heard some thunder far off.  No biggie... plenty of time to make it 3 miles and 1500 feet down to the car. We continued walking.

I didn't really start worrying about the thunder until one clap stopped both C and I dead in our tracks. I'm a huge worrier... thanks to my dad. (see this blog and blame him!) This clap came from the west and it was close! Suddenly we were surrounded by thundering clouds! I began to walk a bit faster, although my asthma had flared up due to the steep climb out of the valley and the horrible air quality in the Appalachians. I asked C, a veteran outdoorswoman, what we do if we are caught in a storm. "Duck and cover" didn't quite seem appropriate and not hiding under the tallest tree wasn't a concern... in fact, there were NO tall trees up here. Just short stubby bushes with us standing tall amongst them.

C, Me, Bushes, Clouds and Lightning.  No bueno...

C suggested when the time came, we should crouch down, yoga-commando style, on one foot, the other balanced on the shoe of the first, hands over head, in a ball. But, she said, it wasn't time yet. We needed to get further down the mountain. We began walking very fast as the winds picked up, fat drops of rain began to fall, and the warring thundering clouds moved overhead and combined into one massive angry storm!

About the time we saw the first lightning bolt hit the ground not far away, C and I took off into a run. Now if you know me, you know I DON'T run! Asthma, remember? Well, adrenaline will allow your body to do amazing things. We ran down the entrenched trail that had quickly become a river. We hopped out of the Appalachian Trail River to run beside it, dodging tree limbs and leaping over boulders in our hurry to get the hell off the mountain. I kept yelling behind me "Now? Time to crouch now?!" C kept yelling "No, Keep Running!" and so I kept running in the now pouring rain as lightning crashed around us.

At some point, a bear joined us on the trail. I don't know if it was the storm or us yelling every time the lightning crashed that scared him but he bounded out of the bushes just in front of me. Normally I would have stopped and let him get away from us but there was no way I was stopping now. We ran behind that bear for 10 minutes or so before he turned into the bushes and away from the trail. That poor bear probably thought we were chasing him!

Eventually we made it all the way down the mountain. Still pouring rain, still raining electricity, still thundering angry clouds. We came to a stop just short of a clearing. Beyond the clearing, 80 yards or so, was my car. Salvation was so close! However, remember how they say you shouldn't stand in a meadow in a lightning storm? So there C and I are, dripping wet, panting and scared, debating over whether to stay in the cover of forest and wait it out or make a run for it. I was all for making a run for it. C was sticking with me. I readied myself with my car keys in my hand and we took off.

Visualize, if you will, all those Vietnam war movies where the men come charging out of the jungle, screaming, the look of war and terror in their eyes. That's what we looked like... soaking wet, seen some action, screaming as we broke free of the sheltering trees! We hauled ass across the field and the street, wrestled with the lock and safely made it into the car. We sat there for many minutes, watching the storm rage around us, trying to catch our breath and piece together these last 4 miles.

This story isn't over yet...
As we sat there, I noticed a strange pounding feeling on my toes. I pulled my soaking boots and socks off to relieve the pressure. After driving 10 miles back to the cabin, my toes were really sore and my toenails were upraised and blue. Weird right? Well, I had on blue nail polish but after removing the polish, the bluish color remained! Within days both of my big toe nails had fallen off, sacrificed to either the hiking or lightning gods. The sacrifice must have worked, I haven't been chased off a mountain by lightning bolts since!

P.S. my toenails grew back great, in spite of what the doctor and C predicted.

Take My Advice.... NEVER Get Into A Canoe With Your Parents

As a continuation of last month's boating hijinks, I thought I'd tell ya'll about canoing with my parents. Sounds like a good idea right? Wrong!

So first off, I don't have a ton of canoing experience.  A few weeks each year at scout camp, a few days canoing the "target" boat while my brother shot, no, LAUNCHED water balloons at me, and then my summer working on the Canadian border in Minnesota. Several years later I'd go urban canoing.

Canoing the northern lakes is usually peaceful. Lots of pine trees and bald eagles, water lillies and loons.

Typical peaceful lake, complete with water lily

mother and baby loon... they let me get pretty close!

Canoing with others is also usually peaceful.

So when my parents came to visit, I thought it'd be a great idea to go canoing! The plan was to head a short distance into a small enclosed area with calm waters. I forgot that canoing with others means teamwork and a clearly defined leader, as well as understanding your center of gravity.

We loaded up, my dad in the back, mom in the middle and me in the front. As we made our way out into open waters, it quickly became apparent that we were not a well-functioning team. I was giving directions up front and paddling; dad was in the back, paddling to his own beat and leaning from side to side to rock the boat and piss off the rest of us; mom was in the middle trying not to fall out. The canoe meandered like it was being paddled by a crew of drunken toddlers; side to side, this way and that, even stopping on occassion. The 5 minute paddle across the channel turned into a 20-minute fight. We were dodging houseboats (probably actually driven by drunken toddlers) and speedboats, both creating awesome wakes that threatened to tip us over.

I guess now is a good time to mention my intense fear of deep open water. This fear developed at a young age as I'd tube (inner tube floating on water) under a bridge on the Comal River. I was convinced that people would jump off the bridge, plunge to their deaths in the river and their bodies never recovered... until I floated along and then they would surface and pop up around me.  Like this....

This fear of the deep never went away, so its safe to say that if the canoe overturned, I'd most likely have a massive anxiety attack and drown. This was less than desirable! We FINALLY made it across the channel, drowning-free, and into the quiet of Lost Lake.

Survived the crossing and into the quiet!

Lost Lake was glorious!  We saw bald eagles, I think we saw some loons, and we were able to maneuver around in our own drunken style. I think my parents were happy we went. Of course, all of this gloriousness was a bit lost on me because I was anticipating the crossing back to the cabin. The horror!!

Soon enough it was time to make the crossing back across the channel.  There was more traffic this time, big boats, bigger wakes.  Oh and to make the crossing all the more pleasant, a storm was approaching. I turned around to face the parents and gave them the talk... we needed to work as a team and get across quickly!

Off we went, trying to avoid the big boats and the bigger wakes. The current and wind had picked up due to the storm, making it unbelievably hard for 3 people, working independently, to paddle across. Somehow we drifted away from our goal and my idea (as lead, I'm allowed to have the ideas!) was to aim for the nearest small island, use it for shelter and work our way around to calmer waters where we could then hug the shoreline all the way home.

This wonderful idea only kind of worked. The canoe was listing to one side, meaning that somebody in the canoe was leaning! This made fighting the wakes that much harder and tipping over that much easier. Mom was beginning to yell, (I guess panicking?) mostly at my father who thought it was funny to tease the ladies in the boat. It wasn't. We made it, frazzled and worn out, to the small island, where I then decided to cut the trip short and head for the nearest dock. I'm pretty sure I had complete support from mom, and nothing but sarcasm from dad. (and you wonder where I get it from?)

So I leave my parents at the canoe landing, and walk up the hill to the closest visitor center.  One of my canoing partners, E, was working and I was hoping she'd help me get the canoe back to the cabin. After bringing my sopping wet and muddy parents up to the visitor center (i knew the pity-factor would get them a ride back!), E and I loaded up and headed for the cabin.  It pretty much instantly began to rain on us, but better us than my parents.  As we approached the dock, there was my dad, waving and laughing and taking pictures and video of our "canoe rescue".

Canoe Rescue!

I guess overall we had a good time, even though mom declared her canoing days were over and I learned that we were NOT a very good team! In the future, I'll stick with canoing with friends and capable strangers.

Another canoe trip where I was able to drink and relax!
Any drunken weavings were from actual drinking.

me and J, proving that the right crew is
sometimes also the craziest

I learned that I prefer to kayak over canoe, others
may join but not in my craft!

I found a better way for my parents to enjoy all the lake had to offer...

In a motorized boat with a real captain!

Um.... Is That Our Boat?!

It's been a wonderful Christmas and a very happy New Year so let's get back to this city-girl's hysterical history working in nature....

It all started when I began listening to my mother....  she wanted me to work in a "green park with trees".  I guess this was her way of saying she was sick of driving across West Texas. (ahem... 12 hours of straight road through brown desert before hitting the New Mexico line, which then has MORE straight roads and brown desert!)  So I headed up north to a forested park with 1000s of lakes and millions of islands.

From a plane, these islands look about as tiny as they really are!

One day mid-summer, I go out for a day-long patrol in a small boat with another ranger.  B was a young guy who had worked here for a few years and "knew what he was doing and would take full responsibility". Famous last words...

We had been island hopping all day, checking campsites and talking to boaters on the water.  These islands don't have docks; you just pull on the shore and tie up.  Like this...

Boating in the north woods is rough business!

After tying and untying all day as we moved from island to island, we were psyched to get to some sandy shores where we could just beach the damn boat.  We beached our boat and headed over to the campsite to clean up some leftover trash.  Dropping the trash, my backpack and our radio back into the boat, we noticed some blueberries up a small hill so off we went.  We were gorging ourselves on luscious sun-warmed blueberries and enjoying a glorious afternoon of blue skies and bluer waters when I happened to look past the bushes and down to the water, seeing something that made my heart skip a beat...

"Um... is that our boat?!" I ask B.

B stood up out of a bush, covered in blueberry juice, and cast an incredulous eye down to the lake where a boat with my backpack and our radio was floating unmanned out to Canada.

B - "Shit!!!" as he ran down the hill to the beach.

Me - "Fuck!  You go get it! You're responsible for the boat, remember?" as I ran after him.

B - "WTF ever! You go get it.  You saw it first!" still running.

Me - "Hell no! I'm a 7 and you're a 5, you go get it!" still following.

B began to strip off his shoes as he ran onto the now empty beach.  Socks, pants and shirt soon followed; tossed onto the sand as he prepared to dive headlong into the lake and chase after our damn runaway boat! Just before he hit the water, I yelled for his glasses.  (can't have him losing those or even if we get our boat back, we'll never make it home!) His glasses came flying at me as he disappeared into the water in a flurry of splashing.

I helplessly watched from shore, pacing nervously and wondering how I was going to explain losing a boat and having to hitch a ride home to my boss.  B raced across the water and finally made it to our boat just moments before it hit the international channel and was taken away by the current.  Luckily he was strong and young enough to haul himself into the boat.  However, before he did, he took a quick look around to make sure nobody was looking!  My heart soared as he roared the boat to life and hauled ass towards shore.

He beached the boat on shore again, making sure to TIE UP.  I turned my head just in time as he stripped out of his underwear and laid on a rock to dry off.  So there I was, holding B's clothes, in full uniform, desperately trying to hide my badge, while standing next to a naked sunbathing coworker.  One more thing to try and explain to my boss... and to B's girlfriend.

After a few minutes, B decided he was dry enough to get back in the boat, still naked but for his wet and now see-through undies.  We loaded up into the boat and floated back to the open water.  Breaking the silence, B turns to me and says "Nobody hears about this! Right?".  I agree and we both burst into laughter.

As we turn the boat and head back towards home, a boat approaches us.  Keep in mind we are in a bright red boat with "Park Ranger" emblazoned cross the sides and B is in transparent underwear.  I plaster a big smile on my blushing face and greet our visitors, a family with small children. (I died....).

All I remember of our conversation with the family was how B kept trying to turn the boat's nose towards theirs to hide his nakedness.  This is exactly what you don't normally want to do and the dad driving his boat kept trying to correct and pull up next to us.  His eyes widened when he achieved parallel status only to see naked B in the drivers seat!  Hah!  He smiled, and giving us side eye, turned his boat away a bit. B muttered something about an unexpected swim and we departed.

By the time we made it home, he'd told several friends we met along the way so the secret was out.  Everyone had a good laugh.. but I don't remember ever telling my boss.

Sorry for not having any pictures of the event.  That would have been PRICELESS!

Christmas; Green-style!

I road-tripped back to Houston to see my family, and to meet some new people who'll be entering my friend-family soon.  Four days, lots of home-cooked vegetarian food, dinner at my favorite Indian place, and tons of love later...

Merry Christmas from the H household!

This year my family really stepped up to my Green Christmas dream!  I'm so happy they did.  It was fun and everyone got a little crafty, even my bro (who knew!)

PSA: My mother would like everyone to know that she reuses her fake tree every year and all of her ornaments are reused.  She takes pride, well-deserved pride, in the fact that many of the ornaments on her tree are 30 years old and hand-picked for their sentimental value.

The following is a montage of awesome wrapping craftiness courtesy of the family!

Guess which presents are mine...

mom made bows from
leftover yarn

My bro accidently made a bow from
a Nazi article.  This
immediately sparked a
political debate!

Kuddos for reusing newspaper but try
to pay attention to the articles.  Mom
accidently used the Obituaries.  Hah!

Dad, the original crafter, used
a horrible pic of me and turned
me into an angel with cottonballs.
i'm keeping this one.

What to do with all those
address labels...

I took some packaging paper that World Market shipped to me with my order and repurposed it into wrapping paper.

This one got the paper grocery bag treatment as
well as a hand-made paper flower.  I teach
kids to make these flowers at work.

We also used a lot of reusable bags.... 

This bag has been mine since I was born.
Mom doesn't even change the nametag. I see it every year.
It is as much a holiday tradition in this house
as anything else we do.

This bag just appeared but my grandmother
made it for me when I was little.  Good
things come in small packages.

I got reusable bags on sale at OFFICE DEPOT.
I looked everywhere and couldn't find any.  Luckily,
mom knew where to go.  They were $2 or so each.
Go forth and stock up for next year!

Some of my gifts were even green Christmas gifts.  My cousin got me a calendar made from recycled products with beautiful tree images all over it.  The parents got me bamboo shades to lower my electric bills  :-)  My bro got me the gift of gardening....

Ah yes... one more hand-made Chrismas decoration to show you...

Handmade by grandma K 30+ years ago.
Everyone has one but this one is mine.

And last but not least, how to make your fake reused tree smell fresh and natural?

dad added his own "decoration" to our tree

Happy Holidays and have a safe reflective New Years Eve.  See you guys after my lovely cuddle-filled 3-day weekend I have coming up.

Kristi

I'm Dreaming of a Green Christmas; part 2

In my last post I'm Dreaming of a Green Christmas; part 1, we learned about ways to decorate your home for the holidays without spending tons of money on decorations and contributing to overconsumption.  Instead you can make your own decorations with things you already have around the house or can find on the cheap.  I find that DIY decorations make the item mean that much more to me.  Anyone can go out and purchase cookie-cutter crap that looks like everyone else's cookie-cutter crap.  (How many house on a block can have that damn blow-up snowman!  My father used to make ALL our yard decorations from his own blood, sweat and imagination.  That's probably where I get my DIY-ness.)

Homemade and more fun!

Thanks for the DIY genes Dad!
ps, I don't want to talk about that dress!  It was my mother's doing.

Anyway, I digress... on to today's post - green gifts and gift wrapping.  The best ways to have an environmentally-friendly holiday season is to make your own gifts or buy them locally, and I don't mean at your local Walmart!  First off, if you need inspiration for why you should buy local, check my chica's blog poco sobre mi vida. 

Now I'm not perfect, some of my gifts did in fact come from chain stores but in my town, chain stores are almost all that exist.  So even though I had to shop at those big stores, I tried to choose gifts that would promote greener lifestyles or at least not hurt the environment (read: no gift certificates to drive thru coffee shops that dispense disposable paper and plastic constantly).  I just realiezed how hard this post will be to write without spoiling the giftees!  I will persevere!  For the kiddos, I got items that don't require electricity and aren't going to generate trash.  In fact, I'm the aunt that gives thrift-store clothing and educational toys.  (They're gonna hate me when they're adolescents and only want commercial goods.)  For the adults in my life, some are getting items that would replace disposable items that they use on a regular basis and some are getting vegan baked goods from my very own kitchen!

If I had at all planned ahead this holiday season, I would be gifting personally crocheted blankets and hats...  Maybe next year?  Maybe even some DIY decorations as gifts?  That would be doubly awesome!  Green gift-giving doesn't mean that the gifts need to be necessity items that they'd buy themselves.  You can be creative and get them something green that they never knew they wanted...  like the year I got my dad bat guano for his garden from a local cave who gave all proceeds of guano sales back to Bat Conservation International.  Yes internet, I gave my dad shit for Christmas!  And he loved it!  Got my mother earrings made from Scrabble tiles with her intials on them.  She loves Scrabble and earrings, and I guess her initials so that was a cute gift too.  See what I'm saying, think outside the box!

I myself have gotten lots of homemade gifts.  See how stoked I am with my new homemade knit hat in this video!?

 So now on to green wrapping.  This is where the creativity and fun really come together!  The first thing to do when getting ready to wrap presents, no matter how you choose to wrap them, is to turn on Pandora and chill out to jazzy Christmas music.  See that?  You just did something green - NOT buying those holiday cds and wasting all that paper and plastic.  Plus, um did I mention Pandora is FREE?  Freakin' sweet!

Now I frequently wrap presents in newspaper.  I don't subscribe to a paper (too much paper!) but I do get those damn sales circulars so I save those around gift time and start wrapping.  I chose not to buy wrapping paper because its so unbelievably frivolous.  To buy paper that will just be pulled off in a few short days?  Ridiculous, even if you recycle that paper, ridiculous! There is enough paper in your home, use that and leave your pocket and the environment better for it.

In complete honesty, this is not my photo.  I got it from the blog C.R.A.F.T.

I also frequently use reycled cardboard boxes, cereal boxes are a favorite of mine.  I use recycled boxes for everything from wrapping gifts, mailing items, and for organizational stuff around the house.... 

Canned goods container made from soda can box.
Now I have more room in my pantry!

This Christmas I plan to use recycled boxes and home made gift decorations, or better yet, wrap gifts inside little reusable bags, like Chico bags or Baggu or something similar.  That way the wrapping is green and its the gift that keeps giving.  (One of my biggest pet peeves is plastic grocery bags.) 

For more wrapping ideas, check these blogs and sites...

C.R.A.F.T for lots of ideas
DIY Gift Wrap for alternatives to paper
Apartment Therapy always has great ideas!
So do their partners, Re-Nest!

To make this recycled bag wrapping, click here for instructions.  This is the best way I've seen to fix your environmental karma after shopping at a big box store. 

Happy wrapping, ya'll, and Happy Holidays!  See ya next year!